{My happy place, and also the cover art for my to-be-written-when-all-my-time-isn’t-sucked-up-by-wedding-planning book, THE 5 STAGES OF GRIEF & WEDDING PLANNING}

Not to be melodramatic, but coming to terms with the cost of a wedding is not entirely unlike the Kübler-Ross model for the 5 Stages of Loss and Grief: 1) Denial and isolation – There is no way flowers/a dress/frosting costs that much! If I just buy it and don’t tell anyone how much it costs, we’ll figure out how to budget around it later. 2) Anger – WHY DOES EVERYTHING COST SO MUCH?! MY BUDGET IS REASONABLE! I HATE THE INDUSTRY WEDDINGS HAVE BECOME! I’M JUST GOING TO ELOPE AND SPEND THE MONEY ON A DOG RESCUE RANCH WHERE I’LL LIVE OUT MY DAYS AS AN OLD MARRIED HERMIT. 3) Bargaining – I can make this work. If we serve no food or alcohol and cut the guest list to 7 people, I can afford that dress and those flowers. This can work. All is not lost. 4) Depression – I don’t love weddings anymore. All is lost. 5) Acceptance – I want to marry Tony and have a fun party to celebrate that commitment, without going into debt. It’s going to be great no matter what, because we’re getting married. Find something that works with the budget and move on.

I preface my story about our catering tasting with this because, next to wrapping my head around the price of a wedding gown, the cost of wedding catering was the next financial journey for me. Like any feverishly obsessed bride, I trolled Style Me Pretty for vendors with the fervor of a CIA agent on HOMELAND searching for terrorists. I put together a list of caterers Martha Stewart would be impressed by, all in the Lake Tahoe and greater Bay Area, and started with my top pick.

I’m not going to tell you their name, because they were lovely, kind people. I will say, they appear on Style Me Pretty all the time; clearly, plenty of non-famous “normals” contract them to cater their weddings. (A lot of famous people contract them, too. There’s a reason I loved them. I have the tastes of a modern-day Marie Antoinette.) But I was clinging to the fact that they also cater to average pedestrians like myself! If those schmucks can afford them, it’s not unreasonable that I might be able to, too!

They quoted me $700/guest.

Denial and isolation. Anger. Bargaining. Depression. Acceptance. Don’t worry, Dad, they will not be catering my wedding!

I’ve come to the realization that most people whose weddings are published had a budget that could have alternatively afforded them a small private island, a jet and/or several mansions. But, more importantly, I’ve also realized you don’t have to spend like the #richkidsofinstagram to have a beautiful, happy wedding. It’s possible. I went to one of the most perfect weddings of all time last weekend, planned by a bride who has her head screwed on much straighter than I do.

{I mean, really. How can it NOT be the best day of my life when I’m getting married in a place that looks like this?}

After a lot more research, I found D’Lish Catering, a local Lake Tahoe vendor. The chef and owner, Lee, used to be executive chef/partner at one of our favorite restaurants in Tahoe, Sunnyside. Marsy, the director of operations, is friendly, detailed, responsive and professional. While they have the most d’lish menus, they’re excited to adapt family recipes and re-create dishes from the couple’s favorite restaurants. And, just to really seal the deal, they happen to have a burrito bar at their catering office (if I wasn’t trying to squeeze into a wedding gown in less than a year, my diet would solely consist of burritos, sushi and frosting.)

{Ready to TASTE}

Marsy provided us with a proposal that fit our budget, and we planned our tasting for Labor Day weekend. Because we’re getting married on my turf, we wanted to incorporate some Virginia delicacies to honor where Tony is from, and generally do an upscale take on comfort food… Because if you’re going to spend that much, it might as well be on stuff people love to eat, and not go fancy just for the sake of fancy. We sent a list of our favorite family recipes and restaurant dishes for Lee to adapt. However, at the last minute, Tony had to work and so my faithful Maid of Honor Katierose stepped up to the plate to help decide on the menu. It was some of the best food I have ever had in my life.

{Brie & cherry tartlets}

{Mini fried green tomatoes with homemade pimento cheese & tomato relish}

{Lobster corn dogs}

{Virginia ham biscuits with honey butter}

{Watermelon, tomato, avocado, crispy bacon, feta & herb vinagrette salad}

{Spice rubbed tri tip with zinfandel demiglace & horseradish cream}

{Katierose taking the tri tip in}

{Truffle macaroni & cheese}

{Yukon gold potato gratin}

{Crispy brussel sprout leaves with pomegranate-balsamic glaze & candied pecans}

{Corn fritters}

{Corn pudding}

{Pan-seared mahi mahi with coconut-panko crust & pineapple beurre blanc}

At this point, we had to take a break from tasting to go outside and stretch.

{Katierose & my mom}

And pose.

Back to eating.

{Fried chicken}

{Sliders on Choux buns with white cheddar and aoli. AND sweet potato fries.}

I’d like to say we didn’t eat for a week, but that’s not true. D’Lish generously let us take leftovers home, and we had them for dinner less than 2 hours later. And the pastry chef was out of town, so Tony didn’t completely miss out – he and I are going back up to Tahoe soon to taste treats for the dessert bar and late-night snacks!

{Or maybe Katierose will come back and continue the food streak with me. Because it was SUCH A FUN WEEKEND. Sorry, Tone!}

So, things worked out for the best (as they tend to). I’m thrilled, and feel so lucky, that D’Lish will be catering our wedding and I can’t wait to shovel all (okay, some – I have that budget to think about!) of the above dishes into my face again when I’m cinched into my big white dress and the wedding diet is officially over.