{My face when my housekeeper told me I needed to have a baby so I’d have a friend.}

Douchiest blog title ever? YEP. But this weekend our housekeeper told me I needed to have a baby so I’d have a friend and that is just where my life is at right now.

Here’s how the convo went down: She came over (with a container full of delicious homemade brownies and granola bars her daughter had sweetly baked for us because she and her family are the kindest people alive). She saw that I was wearing the same sweatpants she’d seen me in the week prior, and likely wondered whether or not I’d changed all week, although she was nice enough not to ask. While I ate some brownies, she decided it was time to lay the hammer down. She said, “It’s time to have a baby.”

Her reasoning? When you have a baby, you have a friend. Someone to talk to. She said, “I know your dogs are your babies and friends and you talk to them, but they can’t talk back.” That’s a tough point to argue with, so I didn’t. (Even though they talk back in my mind.) She drove it home by reminding me, “Tony goes to work. You’re here all alone. With a baby, you wouldn’t be alone. You’d have a friend.”

Then we laughed and laughed and laughed BECAUSE I HAVE TO PHYSICALLY MAKE A FRIEND IN ORDER TO HAVE ONE!!! (No, I was the only one laughing. I think she is really worried about whether or not I have friends, and whether or not I’m going to make a friend for myself.)

happy monday bye.

(Side note: There is no way I am having a baby without her helping me raise it. She is seriously the nicest woman alive. And clearly deeply concerned about me.)